Another Bengali Post :)

Hmmm... writing a Bengali post again, not because of limited English knowledge, just banglate likhte iccha korche.

Chutirdin thakle amar sokalbela shuru hoye 2:00 te kom-se-kom, ar self proclaimed chutirdin hole ektu taratari.Ta kal lokjon phone kore ar sms pathiye janalo je aj E-lab mass bunk kora habe. Besh valo bepar, lokjoner shubhobuddhir agom ghotecche, grade point-e ar lokjon attention pay korche na dekhe besh sukhi holam. Rattire besh taratari ghumiyeo porlam [mane 2:00 to] sokalbelate chokh khule dekhi 12:00 ta baje. Besh sokal sokal uthechi dekhe besh gorbo laglo nijer opor [hasa mana :x], hurumdurum kore toiri hoye niye college gelam. Baba khub chintito chilo amar class attendance niye, sokalbelate naki amake jigyes korechilo class kotaye, ami bolechi 12 tate. Tarpor 10:30 nagat naki deke bolechilo 12 tate class ekhono uthchi na kano??? naki bolechi class rat 12 tate [bojho!!!].

Ami janina kano lokjoner amake dekhlei tader sob sukhdukkher kotha mone pore jaye, mone hoye amake dekhlei mone hoye, " e byatar ektu har jalai" Rastai,train-e sob jaigate bus-er vara briddhir jonye khov, sanssarik osubidha ityadi sunte sunte Jadavpur namlam. Aurobindo tt-er abar amake dekhlei kortyobyer kotha mone pore, edin-o no exception. Rojdin valid ticket dekha sotteo onar kano je mone hoye ami binaticket-er jatri hote pari uni-i janen. Jai hok, samner kakur dokan theke Coke ar special kine onek expectation niye college-e giye lokjon-k tas khelte dekhata khub 1ta sukher kotha noi.

Aj kotha chilo 3 idiots dekhte jaoa habe. Khub valo kotha. " Give me some sunshine, give me some rain" ganta besh valo ar tachara Aamir khan-k Ryan-er role-e kamon manai setao dekhar iccha chilo, o hori! e to Ryan poche berulo Phunsuk. Hothat kore Phintso Dhipdhop Bhutiar kotha mone pore gelo. Jai hok, cinemata otyonto valo, tabe kina amar personally mone hoye Ryan-er character onek besi colorful chilo. Aamir Khan jothesto chesta korecchen roletake fotabar. Perechen to a great extent. Sob miliye, AMAR CINEMATA MARATTOK VALO LEGECCHE. Tabe kina ei sem-e induction motor acche, ar "how does it start?"-er answer-e "bhruuuuuuum" likhle real chap has. Arekta jinis bujhlam je ami kano Ryan hote parbo na, XAM-ER AGER RATE 1TUO NA PORLE AMI TOP TO DURER KOTHA, PASS-O KORTE PARBO NA. :( TABE RYAN TOP KORTO NA. BUT PHUNSHUK TO KORE!! eita hocche sarabocchor dhore porar sufol. Exam-er ager rate ja khusi koro! :(

But eto khusite 1 fota chuna ki thakbe na??? thaktei habe. Hall theke berutei "A few great men" Ciggies kinte jacchilam,Souvik chellalo " Aste habe na toke", "Kano?" " Asis na" " Ami agei dekhechi, sona!! " Ektu kharap laglo.But ovyes hoye gecche. Sagnik-er kothata thik ar sei karonei Eden..... :D :P :P :P. Ferar porthe "Rimli"te 1 ghonta dhore khelam... mane khete 10 min ar order aste 50 min. Vabchi, guiness book of world record-e "Rimli"-r naam pathabo. Chef tussi great ho.

Tarpor dang dadang dang kore, bari chole elam. Kintu 1ta jinis seriously amake vabacche. Eto sundorvabe kono lok ba group of lok ki kore sob trace mucche felte pare. Ki odvut bepar!! kono trace-i pacchi na. Chulke chulke mathaye tak pore gelo, but tao jekhane chilo sekhanei atke ache. Dhucchai, ar vallage na. Dekhi, ebar ekta goppo type-er kicchu likhte habe. :D

Crappy post

This is a crappy post! Guys, take it for spare and don't read it.

Dunno why, I am suddenly feeling a bit changed. Seems like the old me, is coming back to me. Come baby, come to your daddy [no sitters please]. I can see myself alone in the campus, one chilly morning, with wind gushing past me. Nor a breeze neither a storm. One sunny morning, with none in the campus, I can see myself standing alone in the middle of the road, with arms stretched wide [Leonardo De caprio's pose in Titanic], and with my head pushed backwards. I can suddenly see myself enjoying the nature once again. Feeling closer to it. Trees don't wear a mask. Then suddenly this song, that has made me crazy recently, starts playing. Sitting in front of this dumbo box, I can clearly hear the melody. First strum, second strum, third strum and it starts "hey.....". I can see myself grooving my waist, making some feet movements, then suddenly I start dancing. You know, I am not a professional one. Some blurred faces passed by,mumbling " whats wrong with him?" Even I don't know. All I can say, is that I can't resist myself. I can see myself jumping over the walls. I can suddenly see a tint of yellow in the sun.

Proposals

When someone talks about "proposal"s, the first scenarios that flash in my mind, is of an uncomfortable awkward situation, where you are not too sure about what to do, how to do and what to tell. I think its a situation, where one becomes concerned about every little movement of his limbs, every faintest expression of his face and every little reaction of the other person. When I was in the school, I used to make an excellent middleman [wingman to be exact]. Not that, I have made a thousand of relations, but still, I have witnessed quite a few.

Okay! so one day P told me that he has a huge crush on Purmita. Now me and Purmita were not the bestest [intentional] of friends. More so considering the fact that she was one year senior than me. So he told me to make a bit of friendship with Purmita and ask her on behalf of me. I objected strongly. My point was that I'll introduce him to her, but willn't propose on behalf of him. Poor P, he had to agree to all my suggestions. So, it was fixed. I made a "hi-hello" relationship with Purmita.

Next scene:

venue: Madhusudan mancha

occasion: the annual function of the school

characters: me, Purmita and P

the conversation went as I'm jotting down

me: hey there! you wandering here?? why not in the hall??

Pu: ummmm... u kno! actually,I don like those classical thingies that much. M feelin bored inside

me: n wt abt ur friends? [I uttered quite a few of names]

Pu: well! they seem to be enjoying the function, din want to disturb them.

me: then y don u join us? okay! I think u've seen him. He's Pralay, ma classmate and one of the bestest friends and the football champ. Aint it Pralay?

P: Ummmm!!

Pu: Hi! yes! I've seen him quite a few times in the school, have seen him playing football too. He does play well!

P:* " poran jaye joliya" type smile*

me: actually Purmita, P has something to tell to u. I think its hightime. So, P speak it out.

Pu: [smiling] what?

P: ummmmm!

me: *tapping toes*

P: am am amaaamama

P: hehehehehehehehehe

me: [here he goes *sigh*]

P: umma umma umma

P: *huge sigh* okay! the thing is ummmm!!

Pu: I'm waiting

P: ummmm!! do you kno x???

Pu: yes! shez ma friend.

THEN SILENCE REIGNED. A FEW MINUTES LATER PURMITA WENT AWAY. P EXCHANGED A HELPLESS SMILE WITH ME.

M's in love with Priyanka. Quite a big news. M was the good boy of our batch. And Priyanka was an Iran-born hottie. So, one day I was astonished to see quite a gathering around M. "So what's the matter?"- I asked. Someone said, "M has "pro"-d Priyanka."

"Now, what on earth does "pro"-ing mean?"

"he told aila!!!"

"what????"

" yes! he meant to say "I lo" but it sounded like aila"

" wtf???"

" may be someday around, he'll say "bhou"[ve you]"

" so, he's proposing her in installments?"

" you got it"

- so, that's the first time, I got introduced to the word "pro" ing. Enriched my vocabulary indeed.

One day, X told me that Sonya's gonna call me and all I had to say that, " X's got run over by a taxi, please please do inform his family"

okay so that day Sonya called me.

me: hello!

sonya: sonya here, X asked me to call you.

me: yes! sonya, could you please do me a favor?? X's got......

s: WHAT?

me: yes its true.

s:WHEN?

me: about one and half hours back. Please do this for him. He's admitted in.... cz he was sayin ur name. U r the only person in Earth on whom he relies.

s: ONLY 30 MINS BACK, I SAW X WITH ANOTHER GIRL.

me: hello, hello!! sonya sonya!! I can't hear you. *click* [*motherfucker X*]

How can I ever forget me proposing R. It was the HS result out day. I already knew that I've secured a respectable rank in jee, so I was a bit reluctant. I thought it to be the best day to propose R. So, I asked her to spare me a minute.

me: R, could you please spare me a minute?

R: ummm!! okay

me: R u kno?

me: R u kno?

me: R u kno?

me: R u kno?

R: what?

me: arre baba! bujhtei to parchis! :x

R: ha bujhte parchi but amar vison nervous lagche.

[well! I expected either an acceptance or a denial, but this kinda reply was out of my thinking. That relationship never turned out to be. :)]

I personally think that proposals should be spontaneous. I mean to say that, there should be some stammering, mumbling, hesitance associated with proposals. Frankly speaking, even now, when a I catch a glimpse of my last crush, my heart misses a bit. But then a smile appears on my face [but thats for different reason and is out of topic], I personally think that "true" proposals can never be smart and straightforward. Because that indicates either immense mental strength of the person or that the person isn't that concerned about the outcome. Its something like the proposal round in the ragging period, It dint take any effort to say, "didiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, ami tomaye valobasiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii", but come in actual case, even the toughest of the guys stumbles. Its my personal opinion.

Right now, I am feeling like I should write something. But the ideas aren't simply coming in my head. Not a strange thing to me. Such things do happen with me. People laugh and say "You've a great sense of humor", when I try to talk normally, I mean about serious topics. And when I try to crack a joke, they simply give me a vacant look. People say I am a practical joke-er [not joker :x], means I dig up elements of laughter from everyday events. I'll like to narrate one experience. One idle Saturday, me and some of my friends were at the "gachtola" and gazing idly at the field. Now, our college practically becomes a "Nalban" or " Modern Brindavan" during Saturday afternoons, with people from everywhere taking it as an extension of "Dhakuria lake" and doing stuffs that encourage us to shoot films and make money in the pornography industry. [and the guards ask us for ID cards, irony!!! :(]. However, that day, a child was playing cricket with an elder guy. So, one of us spoke out, " these days, the fathers have to do so much of things for their children. I can't even think of my father doing the same thing for me." I said, " or maybe he's their driver, you know in rich families, they send their drivers to play with the children." and the people with me started laughing insanely. It took me a few seconds to realize the reason behind their laughter. "Really, you have a great sense of humor",someone said. I wanted to say, " I didn't want to make such dirty meanings , moron!!" but I decided to stay quite. "When you are in Rome, you should act like Romans" :P

Sometimes, people just refuses to understand. It becomes very difficult to put up with them then. I am narrating another incident. One day, when I was a kid, I went to market with my mom! As we walked, we came in front of an ice cream parlor. I pulled my mom's hand to draw her attention. But no use. Now, I was very stubborn, I decided not to give up and started pulling mom's hand even more forcefully. At last, my efforts came fruitful and mom asked, " Babai tui ki kicchu khabi?" I pointed my finger towards the parlor. My mom replied in an even sweeter voice, " Babai, tumi mar khabe??" I chose to remain silent. Strange mankind. :(

My pops has an awkward habit of accusing me to be responsible for everything that is lost. Okay! its justified when suddenly some cigarettes or a 100 rupee note goes missing. But yesterday, pops summoned me. That day, I returned home at about 10:30 pm, so I was prepared for it. I was determined not to say anything and remain silent. Pops said, " tumi jano tomar jonye amader ki abosthya hoyecche? you are responsible for everything! amar blood pressure rise, tomar mayer blood pressure fall." I remained silent. Pops continued, "Eta kore tumi ki moja pao? tumi ki chao? " etc etc. At last I said some words, " actually Sanskritir ekta meeti....". " Rakho tomar meeting, tumi amar moja [socks] churi korecho kano? tumi jano ami sob kicchu guchiye rakhi. Amar confidence-e crack toiri kore tomar ki lav? tomar ki moja nei??....". I chose to remain silent with only one question wandering into my head, "WHAT THE FUCK???!!!"

People think me to be a very serious table tennis player. Because while playing, I hardly keep my eyes off the ball, and look at the opponent. Sometimes, girls also play tt with us. But I hardly look at them. It all started with one day, I was playing with one of my seniors. He was in tremendous form then, and was making every fucking shots in the earth, land. But I felt something uncanny about his body movement. The same day, I returned home, and tuned into youtube for some salsa lesson. And guess what!! I was alreday acquainted with those moves.From then,I never look at the opponent. I am very bad at concealing laughter.

One day, a girl called me.

" hello! is this Shubham"

" which number are you asking for?"

"xxxxx-xxxxx"

" seems to be correct, but none called Shubham lives here, and I don't know of any Shubham.So, you better check the number"

" shut up and give the phone to Shubham"

" Ma'am you are suffering from some misunderstandings. It seems that you have dialled an incorrect number."

" please Ranjan give it to Shubham."

[who's Ranjan? :O]

"Ma'am"

" you mo-fu. Give it to Shubham. I always knew that you are jealous of us."

[the last words were followed by " o tunir ma tomar tuni kotha sone naaaaaaaaaaaa" from the back ground]

I wondered, Am I Ranjan? May be its hightime to be Ranjan. After all, from the description, it seems that this Ranjan is an unfortunate good guy. And who doesn't like to play the role of an unfortunate good guy.

" Okay Shreya! I lose, was just joking,Ranjan's in the bathroom. Call 5 min later"

" okay but who's Shreya?"

I pressed the red key.

5 mins later the phone rang again. I picked up the phone, and said " This number does not exist please check the number. Yeh number maojud nahin hain kripaya jach le. Ei number-er ostityo nei onugroho kore.... ". Too bad I forgot that this automated message comes in a female voice.:(

One day I went out with a girl, and suddenly a call came to her phone.

girl : " hnnnnnalllllllooooooooo??" [if she's watching this, then this single word will make her realise, who the girl is!! ]

otherside:.......

girl: mane? ami to kono ad deini [in a nasal tone]

otherside:.....

na amar baba-mao deini. apni amar phn no pelen ki kore?

.....

na ami bolchi to ami kono ad deini.

.....

arre apni vul korchen. Ota amar description noye. Apnar valo lagle ki korte pari ami??

.....

girl: cuts the phone.

me: whats the matter

girl: bartamaner patropatri column-e ad dekhe phn eseche. Ami naki amar jonye ad diyechi [all in a nasal tone]

I suddenly felt a burst of laughter. However, that day, I somehow managed to conceal that. However, may be someday she'll hafta place an ad truly, may be not. Who cares???

There's a strange thing about my everyday life, whenever I try to buy fags from a particular shop, the owner exchanges a very unfriendly look with me. So one day I said to him, " Englishra kintu ebar France attack korbe". The very next day he exchanged the same look and I said the same words. And it continued. Recently I have stopped saying those words, because I felt that the offensive look with which I was accustomed has been converted into a look of terror. May be someday, he's going to call the mental asylums.

Buhbye 2009

With days gradually passing by, 2009 is slowly coming to an end. Like everybody, this year [or I should rather say, the events that occurred this year] taught me some important aspects of life, and I'll try to jot the things down here. Its something like a bottom line chart, but it does have some difference. So, here it goes.

1. This year taught me that its not only blue and/or black that makes the world, its the melange of all the colors that makes this world such a happy place to live. While some may differ from me, but I'll stick to my point. So, its not only night. Its the combination of day and night, their complementary nature that makes the total span. Its not only metal.But also the other genres like rock,jazz,blues,punk, grunge, hip hop and even classical that brings totality to music. Previously, I used to hate colors like orange and yellow. Not that I've suddenly started loving those colors, but still... I don't hate them anymore. :)

2. I've learnt that going for the ideal option is not always the best thing to do. The best and the happiest persons in this world make out the best of the things that comes along their way [sentence courtesy: Abhishek :)]. The adaptability/maturity of the concerned person lies in making the non-ideal ones into ideal ones. Basically non-ideality/ideality lies in the point of view of the observer[like, beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder]. So, nothing is non-ideal and nothing is ideal.

3. Solitude is bliss.It gives a person much more time to spend with himself, talking with himself, exploring himself. It's damn necessary, because at the end of the day, most of us doesn't spend more than half an hour standing in front of the mirror. One needs to understand himself because unless I think he/she can't understand others.

4. I still love my family above all. But my love isn't blind. I realized that while I can rebel, but in times, I can also provide a shoulder to my parents.

5. I experienced loneliness probably for the first time in my life. and I realized that its not all bad. It provides one the opportunity to stand at the top, and take a close look at people without their consent. I provides one with the opportunity to shake off the veil that keeps hanging in front of his eyes and prohibits him from seeing the true color of the people around.

6. [point deleted]

7. People are basically of two types. Either they are builders, or destroyers. And it takes ages to build something while only seconds to destroy it. Irony lies in the fact that while a particular person may turn out to be of " builder" type to someone, he/she may well be the "destroyer" to the other.

8. Tears are extremely precious gems. And should not be wasted.

9. I can't get a supple.

10.People say -one should conceal his weakness from this world. If he does not do so, the world starts attacking him at this weak point. Now, here comes a funny thing. I think one should show his weakness to this world. The world will start to attack him. But he should be aware of the extent to which he exposes himself. So that, these perpetual attacks makes him numb [and aloof to some extent], it helps to endure fast.

11. Finally, I am the the best the way I am. None can change me from the core.

12. May be I should shave more frequently. :(

13. The KFC Zinger Burger tastes great. But sometimes, even the biscuit from roadside tea-stall tastes better.

14. There's a huge difference between saying something and doing something.

15. The "Moesby effect" sucks. :x

Yes! I saw you right? I saw you there. Sitting right beside the road, with a steel can in front of you right? and what were you doing there dude? Doing nothing. Not even begging. Your whole body reflected clear cut signs of malnutrition. Swollen belly, cracked skin, tangled hair. You were barely wearing anything as far as I can remember. Okay! may be the winter doesn't seem to bother you that much. So, I am getting deviated from the topic. No, no... lets switch back to it. You were hungry if I'm not wrong, and so you asked for food, or rather you asked for some coins to buy food! People were passing by the road, hardly noticing your existence but I noticed you. They didn't even bother to do anything for you. How mean people have become these days. "Equidistribution of wealth"- I demand. Some people were throwing some coins in your can, how dare they? Aren't they intelligent enough to realize that they are humiliating you this way? But you don't worry. "Main hoon na?" Your days of poverty are over now.This much I can assure you.

Do you know what I am going to do for you? Yes! you got it right. I'm gonna write an entire post on you. An entire blog, can you imagine? Moreover I am gonna put your picture in my blog, may be on photobucket. May be over the entire net. And this way people will come to know about you, and then you know what they'll say to me? They will say," ah uh!! we're shocked to see blah blah blah." An entire community will feel sympathetic towards you. Can you just imagine? SYYYYYYMMMMMPPPPATTTTYYYYY...it tastes better than bread, we'll feed you sympathy, and you won't have to beg anymore. Sympathy bread with a bit of "omg, awwww, oh,uh" sauce.... ummmmmmmmm! delicious.

Too bad this net thingie doesn't even help to set a human body ablaze. Perhaps that's why paper is better. You can use papers,instead of woodpiles in a funeral. You see, better utilisation of resources. x)

Misheard lyrics

There are some very interesting things about misheard lyrics.First of all, you never know when you create a whole new song. Yes! the music does resemble that of the original one, but still sometimes the lyrics can totally change the mood associated with a song. For example, when I heard "Late goodbye" by Poets of The Fall for the first time [It was included in the game Max Payne, and after I finished the game, I somehow liked the song], now at that age, I was not aware of the fact that the lyrics of songs are available over the internet, and neither had I an access to the net. So, I had to guess the lyrics. Okay! It was full of minor and major grammatical mistakes, and after I became familiar with the original lyrics, I forgot the misheard one, but still I can remember that it completely changed the mood of the song, turning it from a gloomy song to a much jollier one. As far as I can remember that the misheard one started with a line something like " It's a sunny day" or something like that.

Another good thing is, if you are confused of your state of mind, I mean to say how actually are you feeling, then the misheard ones sometimes help you to know yourself.When I heard "Fade to Black" for the first time, I reckon I heard Jamie Hetfield saying, "You pissed me off, now I'll just say goodbye." I liked that attitude. Now when I think about the reason behind me hearing so, I reckon I was really in a rebel mood then. xD. A few days back, I saw a video of a misheard lyrics of "Immigrant song" by Led Zepp. It was saying "Fight the whore" instead of "Fight the horde." So, you decide how was the guy actually feeling while hearing the song. :P

This problem [??] doesn't arise when you are listening to a music instead of a song.But even there is an awkward problem. I dunno whether it occurs with everybody out there or its only me, but I tend to associate a particular mood with a particular music. "Comfortably numb pulse- guitar solo" has always been a pull up music for me. I remember, when I first suggested the music to one of my friends, he said, " Its good". I was so shocked by his expression that the following words came out of my mouth spontaneously, " What?? its heavenly.Are you deaf moron?". Now, I realise that, I was wrong, Because musics carry different meanings to different listeners. So what appeared to be a heavenly pull up music to me, may not appear to be the same to another one.

But, one positive point of associating different moods with different musics is that I can listen to that particular music which I need at a particular moment. For example, whenever I listen to "Nottingham Lace" by Buckethead, it tells me that sorrow is always followed by joy,whereas " Night of slunk" by the same, has always been a party music for me.xD