Measurement blues

Hmmm!! What to say!! Wrote one of the worst papers of my lifetime today. Actually the preparation was not that bad but still. You know sometimes it just doesn't remain in our hands. Faced one of the worst papers today. Illogical marks distribution, idiotic question pattern, unimportant questions, HELL!! The first time I saw the paper, I felt an uncanny vacuum inside my head after a long long time. The last time I felt this sensation was about 5 years back. Then I opted for the more difficult part [we in JU, have two different parts assigned for each subject, they must be answered on separate answer scripts]. Not a single answer was completely correct. And then to add insult, the paper was lengthy as hell. :(.

I'm really done with it. The way this semester system drains the last bits of energy from us is simply pathetic. Enormous syllabus, stupid lectures....phewwwwwww. And then JU electrical engineering department, a nightmare for anyone who doesn't rely on plain and simple " mug"ging. The next exams on 26th. :(

Semester starts

Okay! semester started today and as was expected, it started with a disaster. I woke up in the morning at about 8:30 but I was feeling very comfortable being covered by the quilt, so it took about an hour for me to leave the bed. And then, the misery started. I realized that I have lost my registration certificate, the identity card being lost long back, there was no evidence for my identity. So I started panicking. Although, finally it didn't hurt me as my fee book was with me and for Shibajisir it was enough for proving my studentship. However, any other professor would have expelled me from the hall for this.

The machines question was of no surprise as the "duo" decided not to disappoint us by setting an easier paper this time. And the exam got screwed, but it was expected.

After I came out from the hall, and headed to the union room, I found Ritoda there. The old chap has grown some tummies. But it was really a much nicer experience to find old familiar respected faces, than it sounds.

Mom was very tensed because for the certificate, and wanted me to come back home early. But I told her that the trains are overcrowded and so I am heading for the auto, and hence it will take some time. I lied to her. Actually it was not for the crowded train. I wanted to be in the " route no. 6 " yet again. Route no. 6, the very old route from my home to Jadavpur, The school bus used to follow this route. Many golden memories are associated with this route. After the completion of school life, we all got split, with some even opting for different states. Whenever I follow this route, memories of those lost friendships crowd in my mind. A sense of bittersweet feeling surrounds me. Route no. 6 has changed a lot with recently built skylines, supermarkets, housing complexes, gas stations ans all,but its essence of it still remains the same to me.

God and backhand smashes

I am not a great believer in God. But I do believe that there is someone.Someone who looks after you, someone who listens to you when all ears around you turn deaf, someone who understands you even when everybody gets you wrong, someone who always assures you with his omnipresence. God to me have never been a mere deity, someone who should be worshiped, rather I always took him as a friend, the relationship with whom has undergone high and low states,just like the rest of my friends.

I can still remember that day.An usual day it was,with me and my friends enjoying a after college booze session on the ju field. Suddenly, the figure of a particular personnel appeared. Now it's an well known fact, that I feel uncomfortable when I sense that particular personnel around. The reason is known to everyone. However, that day, he was with yet another girl.Suddenly, a sense of hatred against God was generated in my mind.I pulled up my hand and mimicked as if I'm shooting someone in the sky, silently I told to God," Have you been a human, I would certainly have killed you today."

After a day or two, an sms hit my inbox saying something like," we had a break up" etc. I wasn't happy at all but still I told to God, " at last, you listened to me." But perhaps he was smiling then. Perhaps he was saying that, " Let things happen according to your wish, and let's see what happens." In a previous post, I mentioned that life provides a MCQ questionnaire for us and its outcomes are according to the options we select. However, I was talking about one particular incident. What happened next was completely out of my experience, there was a huge difference between what I thought and what actually turned out to be. Everyday, I repented for challenging God that day, and perhaps he was smiling, perhaps he was sad for me too and shed some teardrops in the form of raindrops, but still he sticked to his ego. And at the end of it, something happened that was completely beyond my imagination, proving how wrong I was.

I have learnt a lesson from the whole experience, that you must not challenge the God.What we feel to be a curse, may actually be a veiled boon. In fact they are. He never curses anyone. Let things go by as they are going, at most try to change them a bit, try harder. But if its still not responding then move on. Never challenge God.

At the end of this post, I will like to say sorry to a certain human being. Because I must say that I have never been able to become the "only" friend she wished, rather I always had a crush on her.I am sorry for being unable to become an " only" friend. But for the rest, I don't have even a morsel of repentance in my mind because I know whatever I did was the right thing to do. Be that deleting her from the orkut friendlist, removing testimonials written by her, doubting her sense of self esteem, rebuking or humiliating her or whatever.

Perhaps Backhand smashes have something to do with a mend heart. :D. Today, I can't say that I have recovered wholly, but still I reckon I have understood the whole thing, and I can sense myself recovering.Strangely, during these period, none of my backhand smashes were going right, but today I had two of them bang on spot and zoom past the opponent. :D

Orkut or Facebook?

For me, the best thing about Facebook is [in comparison with Orkut] that you don't really care whether people are online and interacting with you. In Orkut, suppose you had a very long onversation with one of your friends and the very next day, when you start chatting with him/her, it may turn out that he/she isn't interested to chat with you at that time. Besides, there is this universal problem of not having pals online [unless obviously you personally make a call or an sms, and ask him to come online, but then you can carry on the conversation through your mobile, why should you switch to orkut?]. Under these circumstances, a net freak has very limited option because Orkut provides you with only a limited set of features. So people are compelled to visit random profiles or even forced to go through the old scraps [which isn't a pleasant experience always], but then, the fucking Orkut privacy setting has enabled most of the users to set their pictures, scrapbook,videos and even testimonials locked. So there you go, you have nothing to do, you even don't have the option to go beyond your known boundary. I don't mean that this thing is all bad, because certainly it stops people from stalking someone and that security issue is also true to some extent. But all these has made Orkut a pretty boring social networking site.

But then in Facebook, when you have nothing to do, you may indulge yourself in the quizzes, or play games like Mafia wars and Castle age, there are hundreds and thousands of applications ready to entertain you. And you don't really care about whether people are paying attention to you or not! However, these features have obviously made Facebook to get deviated slightly from the " model" social networking site, but I think, this deviation is on the positive side.

The main complaint, that I've faced while requesting my friends to start using Facebook instead of Orkut, is that its a little bit complicated. Well! complicacy comes with functionality. [scientific calculators are much more complicated than regular ones], had Facebook been only a " chat site", the interface would have been much simpler, but its not and one has to realise that you need to give some effort in order to achieve better results.

But the Facebook interface isn't that complicated. One of my friends told me that she finds it difficult to locate the appropiate links [like the links to profile information, pictures etc] in Facebook. But after 3-4 days, now she spends much more of her time in Facebook than in Orkut.

One serious limitation of Facebook, is the chat engine. Its much more complicated than the incorporated gtalk in orkut, and also it lacks functionality and fast response.

Orkut has realeased its new version and strangely enough it resembles the facebook interface to a great extent. Also, it is incorporating some of the "patent" facebook applications [although their no. is very limited as far as I reckon], which clearly tells that I am not the only user, who is pissed of Orkut. And already Orkut has started to evolve in order to match with the increasing popularity of Facebook.

LONG LIVE FACEBOOK

Junctions

Sometimes, we do get blinded and just refuse to see what's coming in front of us. I will clarify what am I trying to say later on but first, lets exemplify it.

When I appeared for the joint, my parents repeatedly advised me to pursue the medical line, but I was so determined to fetch engineering as my career that I never paid attention. It's not that, I am repenting now. But still, may be... who knows??...at least not electrical engineering!! duh!! :x

However, lets get back to the topic. There was one question in the mathematics paper that asked us to determine the maximum value of x^(1/x) or something like that. We, who appeared in the mock tests, experienced this question almost 10-12 times previously and we all knew that the answer was e^(1/e) or something like that. But strangely, the answer wasn't among the options.The nearest was something like (1/e)^e.I got confused and ticked it. However, I never turned the section where the question was set in Bengali. Later I came to know that, in the Bengali version, the correct answer was among the options. It was a printing mistake in the English section.

It is very much likely, that the board realized this mistake and provided us with grace marks so that it didn't cost us. But what I'm trying to say is that never get blinded. It may appear to you that, life has provided you with only a single option. But it's never the case. Life sets a MCQ questionnaire for us, and depending on our answers, our lives get molded. We face the consequences that are created by us. None other is responsible for that.

Always remember that; in any juncture of life, even if it appears to you that you have a single way in front of you, there's always at least another. That's why its called a juncture of life. The other road may be thorny, shadowy but its still there. Now, its upto you, which road will you choose.

Altered [??] bridge

It really feels nice to see bonds being created.It really feels nice to see cute lovestories. It still feels nice. The last time I can remember, I reckon I thought I will get shattered, but it really feels nice to see myself still standing. It really feels nice to laugh like a madman. It really feels nice to realize that luck is not fucking you.

Recently, I've become a huge fan of " Alterbridge". All hail to Mr. Souvik Bhattacharya for letting me know about this band. Now-a-days, I am listening 100 times daily to the song " come to life". The "bring me to life"s or " further away"s or " missing"s aren't attracting me that much now. However one line in that song goes something like :" remember life is long, but we've no time" or something like that.

Today I heard about a lovestory from one of my friends. It goes something like the boy and the girl didn't know each other previously.They met via some social networking site and then they started sharing each others balcony. From social networking to some chat engine, then sms-s, phone calls and finally dates and getting committed. I expected a sigh from myself, bit instead a smile appeared in my lips. Hell!! Even I don't know myself, how come I expect others to know about me? However, lets get back to the topic, the moment I sensed the smile, I felt gleeful. I felt that inspite of repeated blows, the world still hasn't been able to kill me. I haven't changed [thankfully]